Grace in Disguise

"But Noah found grace in the eyes of the Lord." ~Genesis 6:8

Often when we think of the story of Noah we think of the verse above... how Noah found grace in God's eyes, how Noah and his family were spared the fate that so many other people had fell victim to, by their own choice.

Rarely do we think about what grace looked like on that ark on the 23rd, or on the 32nd, or on the 39th day. Rarely do we think about the fact that grace is not always pretty when living through the preliminaries, especially when we don't yet realize they are simply just that....a beginning, not an ending.

The Bible says in Genesis 7:24 that "the waters prevailed upon the earth an hundred and fifty days." 150 days living with a bunch of stinky animals....Imagine how gross those stalls must have been!

The smells...the claustrophobia...5 months!!!

Oh, but then consider the alternative.

Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. ~Phillippians 4:11

Calvary was very ugly. It's hard for us to even comprehend the brutality that occurred on that day, but it was even worse for those who had walked with Jesus day in and day out, who had to stand by and witness God in flesh being treated worse than a criminal.

If  only they could have truly understood then, what we are so blessed to understand now.

Circumstances in your life may look bleak. You may feel like you have "drawn the short straw" ...possibly multiple times over. Know that His grace is sufficient. He trades beauty for ashes and makes all things beautiful in His time.

To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified. ~Isaiah 61:3

And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. ~2 Corinthians 12:9

Never Never NEVER Give Up

"Never, never, NEVER give up." ~ Winston Churchhill

The blog below (posted by another one of my close friends) tells the testimony of a dear friend of mine, a friend I just met this last summer, but that I now feel like I've known forever. One day this last July her and another friend and I went to a restaurant for lunch on a Sunday afternoon. I had heard she had an amazing testimony and asked her to please tell me it. Two hours later this girl I had just met that morning had me in tears right there in that restaurant as she shared her testimony with me. The tears came because God in a strong way began to speak to me to never give up on anyone. To ALWAYS keep reaching and to NEVER place judgement. Isn't that exactly what Jesus would do?

I hope this short version of her testimony ministers to you as it did to me.


Fancy~Shmancy: A letter from Angel: "In late September, I met a young lady with a big smile and lots of spunk. Her and her friend Linda were introduced to me and my friends thro..."

Watching God Work

“When God is looking for someone to use He looks to the prison, not to the palace.” ~Rev. Jeff Sanders

Has God ever spoken something to you and you wish that He hadn’t? I don’t mean something chastising, but a word of direction regarding your future or a promise, yet you found yourself wishing that He had just kept you out of the loop?

I am, as some rednecks would say, a “get ‘er done” type person. I consider myself more a follower than a leader, but if I look around and no one is leading, I’ll usually take the reins and do what has to be done. So, if I’m at point A and you tell me I’m eventually going to be at point C, I intend on doing what it takes to get there…because that’s where I’m supposed to be going, right? Why waste time? Why take the 10 mile trail when there’s a 5 mile short cut?

So, when I, apparently at the right time, listened to a cd of a message Bro. Royce Wilson had spoken at BOTT 2009, a minister’s conference hosted every year by a church in Alexandria, I was reminded that, when God’s timing is right, He will begin to speak, but not before then.

You see, before listening to this message, I was getting pretty upset, and was letting God know about it. I was asking Him things like, “Why tell me something if there’s nothing I can do about it?” (Remember, my “take the reins” personality description up above?”) I felt God gently tell me, “Because you asked.”

“Ok…He did get me there.” I did ask. Every major decision I make I pray and fast about. And I had been doing a whole lot of that at this pivotal time in my life. So yes, He had answered and He had answered in more detail than I would ever have expected.

Yet, I still found myself wondering, why, knowing how I am, would you choose to show me this, a Point C with a road block? Then I felt God reply, “So you would have to trust me, and know it was me and me alone who got you there.”

Sometimes, if most people are in a lazy mood, they don’t have much of a problem sitting by letting someone do something on their own…but most people also, that have a high level of respect for someone, if they see them working on a project, etc, that they feel they could lend a hand to help with, are usually going to help, or feel guilty not doing so. And this is all well and good. But we have to be careful not to take this approach with God, remembering that His ways are above our ways and His thoughts are above our thoughts. Usually his plan is so complex and so much better than what we would imagine that we would merely be in the way if we attempted to “help”.

Yes, faith without works is dead, but sometimes our “works” simply has to be to pray and continue to do what’s right.

Bro. Wilson’s message was about being a “stranger in the land of fulfillment”.
He talked about how when God gives you a promise, you are not crazy; it will come to pass. His references were to the story of Joseph. He also said you are not wrong to share that “dream”/ promise with people. It is true that they may take it the wrong way, but you are not wrong to share it. He goes on to talk about the different stages of fulfillment…One being the prison. This is where the words from Rev. Sanders stood out to me.. “When God is looking for someone to use He looks to the prison, not to the palace.” God doesn’t usually pull someone straight from the palace to do his work. There are things He wants you to learn so you are ready when He places you where He wants you. Sometimes you may have to go through many trials to reach this point. Perhaps the greater the call the greater the trials? Yes, this is a scary concept, but the more and more I read the bios of people of God who have been used mightily, the more this seems to be the case. Obviously it is not because God doesn’t care, it because He has faith you will endure, come out as gold, and will be able to be used at a level you never would have been prepared to have been used had you just experienced the palace, and not the prison also.

So, are you willing to watch God work? To trust Him with a hands off approach in whatever trial you may be facing?

You might be wondering, how can anything good happen or change if I’m just standing still? Sometimes you don’t have to understand something. You just have to believe God’s word & trust Him.

And Moses said unto the people, Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the LORD, which he will shew to you to day: for the Egyptians whom ye have seen to day, ye shall see them again no more for ever. ~Exodus 14:13

Ye shall not need to fight in this battle: set yourselves, stand ye still, and see the salvation of the LORD with you, O Judah and Jerusalem: fear not, nor be dismayed; to morrow go out against them: for the LORD will be with you. ~II Corinthians 20:17

Hearken unto this, O Job: stand still, and consider the wondrous works of God. ~Job 37:14

Relax, Stand Still, & Watch. God is in control!

The earth is the LORD's, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein. ~Psalm 24:1

Sit Still

Something that I found quite humorous occurred in one of my classes today. While teaching (actually, at this time reading) in my Biology class about mammals, a new student raised his hand, said, "I know this is random but..." and asked his question. His question was about tornadoes, not animals. One of the posters on the classroom wall has a chart about where tornadoes tend to occur and at what time of year they are most likely to occur. Apparently, he was busy staring at this poster, almost too far away for him to even be able to read, while I was reading about mammals.

Some days this might annoy me. This particular day I decided to let it slide and let conversation ensue for a few minutes, mainly because I found it so amusing. You see, this student asked this question with fear in his eyes. This Senior, who is from near a very large city in the northeast, from my understanding was mixed up in the gang world. I'm pretty sure we are pretty much temporarily doubling as his "protection agency". This "gangster"...is scared of tornadoes.

His question was if they get tornadoes in Tupelo. The other students, of course, were quick to reply, in almost a bragging sense, that they do. They went on to tell random stories of buildings blown away, people killed, etc...the more they talked the more his eyes widened. It was all I could do not to start laughing. Here, the new "cool guy" on campus (per some of the students already starting to try to look like him in fashion sense, etc) was starting to freak out because he doesn't want to die in a tornado. No doubt, he has probably seen many bullets fly, but a tornado? God forbid.

I quickly assured him that everyone he had met who lived there had probably survived a tornado, if they'd lived there at least a year, so he had nothing to worry about. He, of course, referred to the one local death one of the kids had mentioned (not even sure it was true) and said, "Yes, but I don't want to be the one that dies!" I once again told him he had nothing to worry about, and quickly steered the class back on course.

It made me wonder though...how often are we like this? God brings us through one crisis after another (not sure about this? if you're still here, he's brought or is bringing you through) and yet we find ourselves worrying about every little thing. Worrying about it until it becomes way bigger than it is. And forgetting that even if it were truly a mountain, God could move it.

Recently I was reading a book that Sis. Joy Haney wrote. She spoke of how one time her and her husband were going through a very rough time in their lives and that God spoke to her one day that she must remember that, no matter the situation "God is in charge!" Ruth 3:18 also came to her mind: "Sit still, my daughter, until thou know how the matter will fall".

Don't dream up worse case scenarios. Don't throw in the towel before the last round. Remember: You have God on your side. Your job is to have faith and let Him work. Hear that? Let HIM work. Don't strategize, manipulate, or try to speed up the process. Trust. Have Faith. Live a Godly life, day in and day out.

God spoke to me last year through a very sweet and godly lady that I have desires and dreams and that God has even greater ones for me. I've came a very long way in the last few years at embracing some of the desires and dreams it appears God has for me, but I still believe even now that they are even greater than I can imagine. And I'm holding Him to it. Because that's exactly what He wants me to do.

I've seen what He's done in the past. And that gives me hope for what He will do in the future. My God has never failed. And He never will.

God of the Detour

So here I am. Arrived at TCMM on Saturday and I have already almost finished getting settled into my apartment, met somewhere close to a hundred people, all of whose names I’m trying to quickly memorize, and started teaching 5 different subjects for my first time ever.

I am really excited about a class I didn’t realize I would be teaching and that’s the Bible class for the Junior High students which has about 30 students in it. Not only that, but I get to create my own curriculum (in other words teach whatever I feel to teach). What an awesome opportunity! I had brought tons of my notes and books from my Bible school years, because I was wanting to do a lot more studying this year in my free time, however now I’m reeeally thankful I decided to bring them, because I sure know I’m going to need them!

The other classes I’m teaching are English I, Health (twice), Biology, & Basic Math. Yeah for English & Health! As for Biology & Math..I shall survive. :o)

Being the new girl at TCMM is quite interesting. Before classes started I had lots of the kids ask me random things like, “Are you my new Science teacher?!” or state, “My name’s _____ & you’re my new English teacher!” And then there are the ones who have asked if I’ve started college yet, since a lot of them think I'm about 19. Some of the staff have shared with me random comments the residents have made regarding their first impressions of me. Amusing stuff. :o)

My first day of classes went waaay smoother than I had expected. The plan had been for someone to assist me a few days, but that didn’t end up happening. I’m glad though. Think they would have made me more nervous than the kids!

A few things I can say about the people here so far: I have never been around so many people that truly have a servant’s heart. Any help I have needed, not only has someone been more than willing to assist me, but they often offered before I’ve had a chance to even ask. Also, everyone has been very welcoming, to the extent that I can totally understand how this would be a great place of healing for a hurting child. I have felt very welcomed from the second I arrived here.

I know the future will hold many challenges. As I already knew, all my students are not little angels. A few in particular, who I’ve already figured out from just the first day, are going to be extreme challenges. And I also know that working, eating with, going to church with, and living in such close vicinity with around 50 of the same people (staff) and approximately 50 resident kids will be an interesting experience in itself. But I am going to learn. I am going to learn a lot, no doubt, and grow in ways I didn’t know I could, or perhaps even knew I needed to grow.

Yesterday I met one of the youngest resident girls and, within 5 minutes after meeting me, she had sneaked up behind me to hug me. My heart melted. That's what it's all about. These kids need to know that they can love and are lovable.

Sometimes detours happen in life. I used to get lost and get frustrated. Now when I get lost, if I’m not on a tight schedule, I don’t sweat it. It is at times like this that I have had the most awesome experiences. Of all the places I have lived, short term or long term, it is during times of being lost, or rather “detoured” that I made the most beautiful discoveries. In Indianapolis & St. Louis I discovered beautiful, “I thought these only existed in movies”, neighborhoods. In Holland I discovered a beautiful marina. In Estonia, the best place to see the prettiest view of the city. In Lithuania…a whole lot of awesome things (I got lost really bad one day. lol).

My point is, sometimes in life you may feel like you know or even you may know for sure where you are supposed to be headed. However, if God steers you a different direction for a bit, don’t sweat it. He has His reasons and I assure you they are good. Eventually it will all make sense. For me, being at TCMM is somewhat of a “detour” but also a fulfillment of a long forgotten childhood dream.

Apparently God remembered what I had forgotten. Imagine that. He is indeed a God of the details. And even if you’re a perfectionist I assure you that He “dots his Is and crosses his Ts” much more than you do. Your creator knows exactly what you need and at what time you need it. If He decides to take you on a detour for a short while, don’t explode in frustration. Look around; enjoy the scenery. Learn from it. I feel confident that if you look closely you just might find beauty in a place you never imagined it could exist.

The Waiting Room

Lately I have been thinking a lot about God's timing, and decisions such as when to move and when to stand still. I feel like I'm in a waiting room and I'm not completely sure what I'm waiting for. I could be chilled out, relaxing, while listening to the radio, napping, or watching a movie...but instead I'm sitting on the edge of my seat, twiddling my thumbs, staring at the door. When that door opens I'll jump up, grab my bag and take off...but, for now...I am waiting. I hate waiting. Today I stumbled onto a few interesting websites dealing with this subject. I don't necessarily agree with everything stated, but to the most part, they are enlightening and definately worth the read:

Waiting 1

Waiting 2

Isaiah 40:31 - But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

Isaiah 40:27-31 (The Message)

Why would you ever complain, O Jacob,
or, whine, Israel, saying,
"God has lost track of me.
He doesn't care what happens to me"?
Don't you know anything? Haven't you been listening?
God doesn't come and go. God lasts.
He's Creator of all you can see or imagine.
He doesn't get tired out, doesn't pause to catch his breath.
And he knows everything, inside and out.
He energizes those who get tired,
gives fresh strength to dropouts.
For even young people tire and drop out,
young folk in their prime stumble and fall.
But those who wait upon God get fresh strength.
They spread their wings and soar like eagles,
They run and don't get tired,
they walk and don't lag behind.